Please don't leave me again
by Getinfected
Summary: Rachel and Jesse have a fight, and Rachel runs out of the door. What happens next was very unsuspected. -St. Berry futurefic. Story better than summary, swear. R&R!
1. Chapter 1

She knew it. How could she be so stupid ? She was walking home from the afterparty, the streets were absolutely not deserted, how could they, in the city that never sleeps. She breathed the cold summer air, and let out another sob. She heard her heels tap on the footpath, they echoed between the buildings loudly, and the murmur of the people passing her. She walked past a couple, his arm firmly around her waist. And another one, another on, another one, another one,… She felt like she was falling down in a black hole, she suddenly felt really disorientated and the need to get out of there, far away from everything. It was times like this she missed Lima. That she actually missed being a Lima-loser.

She started running home. _Their_ home. She lived with him, yes. She moved in with him when she lost her own apartment. They were friends then, they had been since they bumped into each other in the theater once. He had explained everything, and she agreed to be friends. So when she lost her apartment, he had been a good friend and offered her his spare room. Everything went fine, she was perfectly able to hide her feelings 'till he suddenly decided to kiss her, and _more. _That was yesterday now.

They were at an after party from Wicked. She had the lead role, and he had a small role in it too. She was talking to Allie –aka Glinda the good- when she saw her kissing him. Her, is Jessica. And Jessica is a bitch. A blond haired slutty bitch. She looked away very quickly, but that didn't mean she hadn't seen it. She threw the door open, tossed her bag on the floor and disappeared in her room. She changed in a black tshirt and some dark blue sweatpants. She 'jumped' on the couch, turned on the tv and switched canals until she found Bridget Jones's Diary. Perfect for this mood.

She wasn't hurt tough. Weeell… maybe a little. But she was mostly angry. She was angry at herself, for being so naïve again. She fell for him again, and now he stepped aside and she landed on the floor.

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><p>She heard a door open. Footsteps coming in her direction from behind her.<br>"Hey, were were you?" he asked when he entered the living room, tossing his jacket aside.

"I got bored, so I went home." She answered icily.

"Why didn't you say anything? I spend like 30 minutes looking for you!" he was annoyed. He wanted her to notice.

"Oh, well I'm sorry. I didn't want to interrupt you and Jessica, you seemed busy." She was still not facing him, her eyes were locked on the screen. He just stood there, behind the couch.

"What do you mean?"

She stood up and looked at him. "Look Jesse, I thought last night actually meant something to you. Like it did to me. I'm sorry, I was wrong." And with that she made a perfect Rachel Berry-storm out to her room. He just stood there. Glaring at the door like she was about to come back out every moment. But she didn't. He sat down on his bed, with his head in his hands. _She saw those 3 seconds? If she would've looked ONE second later she would've seen me pushing her away and telling her to stay the fuck away from me. God, why do you hate me? _

His thoughts were cut off by a door opening. He saw her walking to the kitchen, grabbing a piece of chocolate and walking back to her room. Ignoring him completely. Or she just didn't see him, also possible.  
>By the time she came back, he had already blocked the door opening, leaning against the door frame with his elbow.<br>"Jesse, let me trough." She said neutrally.

"No." he answered simply. A smirk on his handsome face. He couldn't help it.

"Jesse."

"no, I'm not letting you in!"

"Fine." She spat, and sat down on the couch again, picking her movie back up.  
>He turned the tv off, earning a violent look, and sat down on the coffee table right in front of her.<p>

"Don't be like this Rach, Pl-"

"Don't be like this? Jesse please, the first time I give myself to you, you break an egg on my forehead. Do you know how much it took me to forgive you? I trused you, I told you everything, and you dropped me. The second time you go kissing some other girl, how am I supposed to react huh?"

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><p><strong>Heeey, so, what do you think? should i continue?<br>Chapter 2 at 10 reviews! **

**love, Hach. **


	2. Chapter 2

**So I know I said I'd update at 10 reviews, well guess what; I got bored.  
>So here it is anyway! Hope you like it!<br>Disclaimer: I do not own glee. If I would, Rachel and Jesse would be getting back together after prom. Well, I hope they do! I'm so excited for the prom episode!**

His grin was definitely gone now. He'd screwed it up _bigtime._

"I'm sorry…" was all he could bring out. It was like somebody had kicked him in the balls, _God, I'm a monster! _He felt a tear rolling down his cheek, but didn't care about whipping it away.  
>She looked at him. Just looked at him. She needed time to figure out if he was lying, he was a good actor after all… She tried to regain her angriness, but she couldn't. She actually felt <em>sorry <em>for him. But he still kissed that slut! While she was making up her mind, she kept staring at him. It annoyed him a lot. _Should I continue? Oh, what have I to lose. _

"I… She kissed me! I-I pushed her away! I didn't want to kiss her! Please believe me.. I'm so sorry, I keep screwing things up…" He was _really _crying now. Tears flowed over his cheeks. He buried his head in his hands. When he calmed down and his sobbing stopped, he rose his head and said, "Don't go away, I need you… I- I know what'll happen when you're gone _for good_…"  
>The sobbing took over again and his head found its way back to his hands. Why was he crying? Jesse St. James never cries, right? <em>Ugh, she must think I'm such a loser." <em>

He felt something take his wrists gently and pulling them down. He bite his lip and kept his eyes closed. A thousand scenarios passed in his head; she'd slap him, she'd yell at him, she'd just go to her room and pack her stuff. What actually happened was none of them. She got up, and sat down at his lap. He looked up to her and locked his eyes with hers. She smiled lightly, a gentle smile.

She could see right through him. She looked into his watery eyes, and saw hope. She wrapped her arms around his neck, and pulled him close. His head was pressed against her collarbone and he could smell her perfume. He breathed in deeply, the scent filling his nose. He felt her heart beating, and said to it; "I love you."

It was so quiet he thought she wouldn't hear, but at least her heart would know. But she did hear it.  
>"I love you too." She whispered back. He couldn't help his lips growing in a huge smile. She let go of his neck. They looked at each other again and she bent down and kissed him full on the lips. They opened their mouth at the exact same time to let their tongues battle against each other. He deepened the kiss by wrapping his arms firmly around her waist.<p>

**Kay, so I know it was short, but I promise next chapter will be much longer!  
>Love, Hach.<strong>


	3. Chapter 3

When they let go, she still had a concerned look on her face.  
>"Please believe me…" He whispered. He really did not want things to end this… weird. She just kissed him right? So she believed him right? Then why did she had that look on her face?<p>

"I want to… B- but I don't know if I can…"

"Okay- wait, what? Why not?"

"Because. You lied to me before. You already realized how naïve I am." A tear rolled down her cheek. Her heart said _fuck the lies, go fuck his brains out. You love him! He loves you! You can feel it, I know you can, I'm your heart. I know everything about you. _But her brains said _be careful! He hurt you twice, you can't let him do it a third time! _

"I'm not lying Rachel. I promise I'll never lie to you again." He whispered. This couldn't be happening!

"I need time to think." She whispered. She stood up, grabbed her purse and stepped out the door.

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><p>Jesse lay in this bed, thinking about tonight. This morning he felt so happy, and now he just felt like a pile of bones and skin, doomed.<p>

He couldn't believe she was gone. _ No. She's not gone. I'm not letting her go. Who does she think she is to just walk out of my life like that? A __random__ person? Besides, all her stuff is still here. And what did she mean by 'time'? a half an hour? A day? A month? Where would she stay? She's gone for 4 hours now, what if something happened? _

With that his eyes flew open. What if something DID happen? It was past midnight and New York! It's dangerous! He grabbed his phone from the nightstand and dialed the familiar number. It went over twice before she picked up.

"Jesse?" her voice was raw, painful almost.

"Rachel? Where are you? I'm getting worried!" He heard her sob.

"Jesse, please come and get me, I- walking out the apartment was the dumbest thing I could ever do," she sobbed again. His heart sunk and tears welled up again.

"Rachel, where are you?" His voice was worried, he was _slightly _panicking.

"I'm in an alley, close to the coffee shop. Please…" another sob.

"I'm coming." He said, grabbed his keys and ran out the door.

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><p><strong>Okay, so i know it's short again, and i promised a long one, but i had this idea and i just had to write it!<strong>

**I do not own glee. I wish i did tough. **

**Xoxo, Hach.**


	4. Chapter 4

**Hey you guys! So here's the next chapter!  
>First, I'm sorry it took so long to upload! I've been just so busy with my other story's that I lost my eye on this one! But here it is!<br>Second, I do not own Glee, if I did, I would give Jesse a fucking lead role instead of Finn, and I would DEFINITELY scrap the Finchel-makeout scene at Nationals. **

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><p>Rachel sat on the cold ground. She leaned against a waste container, the cold plastic felt good on her hot skin. She sobbed softy, and with every sob her chest hurt. She felt the dry blood on her hands, legs and face, it had been hot, but now it was just clammy and annoying. She knew that if she hadn't walked away that night, this wouldn't have happened. But she was so desperate. She was walking towards the coffee shop close to <em>their <em>apartment, she passed the dark alley. She didn't like it, never did. It was like a black hole and she almost ran to pass it. Not fast enough.

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><p>Jesse heard his footsteps echoing through the dark alley. "Rachel?" He yelled.<br>No answer. "Rach?" He hurried deeper into the small street. She couldn't be that far away, he already saw the dead end. A huge wall. He shivered, it was really creepy there, he heard rats running over the waste containers. "Rachel?" Still no answer.

He looked around, but it was too dark to see anything. There were no lights in the alley, and he couldn't count on the moonlight, 'cause the thick clouds that predicted a storm were blocking it completely. He pulled his cell phone out his pocket and pressed 2. She was number 2 on his speed dial ever since they were friends again. He held the phone to his ear and waited for the beeps. Along with the first beep the familiar song of 'Don't rain on my parade' echoed in the alley. He turned around and noticed the light of a cell phone. It was lighting up a woman. It was her. He walked closer and his breath shocked.

_She was covered in blood. _He ran up to her and took her head in his hands, which caused her to wake up; she fell asleep waiting for him. "Oh my god, Rachel? Rach?" She opened her eyes and they met the ice blue ones of a certain Jesse St. James. She nodded softly and gave him a little smile.  
>"C'mon," he whispered in her ear, "I'll carry you." He slid his arms under her knees and back. She moaned. The pain went through her like every part of her body was on fire. He lifted her gently and made sure he had a good grip on her. "Shhh," he whispered, "it's all gonna be okay…"<p>

He hoped he was right.

He carried her home –thank god the coffee shop was only one block away- and lay her down on the bed. He went to the corner of the room to flip on a little light, she had been in the dark for so long, the strong light at the ceiling would hurt her eyes. It was a gentle kind of light. Smooth, cozy. It was strong enough to study her injuries though.

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><p>His usually so bright eyes filled with tears as he examined her body. She was still dressed in the dark blue sweatpants and black top, only the pants was ripped to shreds, and the top was half pulled off, revealing her purple lace bra.<p>

Her arms were covered in abrasions and bruises. Her right shoulder had a big blue spot on it. Her legs were cut and bruised, somebody clearly man-handled her. Jesse got overwhelmed by rage and wanted to punch his fist through the wall, but that wouldn't help. He'd just have a broken hand. He sat down on the edge of the bed and studied her face. There was a cut right above her eyebrow, and it had bled big time. Her eyes were closed, she fell back asleep in his arms, and her jaw started swelling.

He hated himself right now. It was all his fucking fault! He got up and went to the kitchen. A few moments later he came back with a pair of scissors in his hands. He cut her top open –it was ruined anyway- and tossed it away. There was a gigantic bruise right under her ribs and it looked rather painful. He continued by cutting open her pants, which was harder since it was really skinny and he was scared to hurt her too with the scissors. Once it was of, he tossed it with her top. Her legs looked less hurt, but there were still some bruises and blood excesses. He took her ballerinas off and checked her feet. They seemed okay. He went to get the first aid kit and took care of every single wound. It wasn't until then that he saw her nails. They were covered in blood. He took the wet washcloth and washed it off. When he was finally done, he grabbed a blanket and covered her with it. He lay down next to her; if she woke up, he wanted to be there if she needed anything.

He couldn't sleep. He turned to her and looked at her beautiful face. He sighted. This was all his fault. He felt incredibly guilty. "If you only knew how much I love you…" He whispered.

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><p>Rachel felt pain everywhere. I wasn't the normal pain she felt when she had rehearsed too much, it was <em>real <em>pain. She woke up from a sound of somebody turning around in bed, she had no idea where she was. Her eyes felt heavy and she didn't want to open them, afraid for what she'd see. She couldn't move either, the pain was too hard.  
>"If you only knew how much I love you…" she heard an all too familiar voice whisper, and felt safe immediately.<p>

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><p>Jesse woke up with 'the guilty ones' from Spring Awakening being hummed by the most beautiful voice in the world. He opened his eyes and stared at the gorgeous creature next to him. Her eyes were open, staring at the ceiling.<p>

He got up and crawled over to her. His head hung above hers and she smiled a little.  
>"Are you okay?" he asked worried.<p>

"Yeah, mentally anyway." She said sore.

"Do you have a lot of pain? I tried to take care as much as I could about everything, and-"

"It's okay. It's way better the last night anyway." He smiled and pecked her forehead.

"Do you want anything?" He asked.

"Uhm, maybe some coffee?" She suggested. He nodded. "I'll make you some."

Rachel nodded and sat up. It didn't hurt that much anymore. She studied her body. He really had taken amazingly good care of her; all the blood was cleaned away, there were plasters over her abrasions and cuts and there were bandages around the really bad ones.

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><p>When Jesse arrived in the kitchen, he sighted deeply and ran a hand through his hair. He hated himself for letting anyone do something like this to her. <em>Why didn't I ran after her? I'm such an asshole! <em>He walked back to the room with the two coffees in his hands, and stopped in the doorframe. She was examining her body, she looked so vulnerable. She squeezed her eyes shut at some movements. At that very moment, Jesse St. James promised to himself that he would protect Rachel Berry forever. If she wanted it or not.

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><p><strong>This was it! i hope you liked it, it took forever to write!<strong>

**I'm asking it again; do you guys think my chapters are too short? **  
><strong>Anyway, Review please!<strong>

**Love, Hach.**


	5. Chapter 5

Jesse entered the room and gave a cup to Rachel. She took it and smiled at him, a smile that was so genuine and loving, but hurt at the same time. She put it down on the nightstand, and he did too. He sighted and sat next to her on the bed, their backs leaning against the blue wall.

He knew he had to say _something _about the kissing subject, and he decided it was better to get it on with than to wait. "Rachel, I'm really sorry about last night," he started. "but I'm standing ground that I didn't kiss her, so I didn't do anything wrong actually; I pushed her away as soon as I realized what happened…" He didn't expect it to be so stubborn, but it was the truth.

"I know. I'm sorry I reacted so heavily." She admitted softly. "It's just…" She sighted and stopped.

"What?" He asked her carefully.

"With- with everything that happened, I just… It keeps floating in the back of my mind, you know, and…"

"And?"

"I don't know." She shrugged. "I'm scared of losing you again, of _you_ leaving _me_ again. I guess I'm just… extra defensive because of that." He turned his head and saw her tugging at the bandage at her wrist, there was a tear rolling down her face.

"I swear I'll never leave you again." He whispered. She turned her head to face his, her eyes were now filled with pain and hope, and she couldn't help but continue crying. "I promise you, I'll stay by your side forever. I promise I'll protect you from everything that wants to hurt you, I promise I'll let you sleep on my chest every single night, and I promise I'll take care of you whenever you need me to. f you want it or not Rachel, I'll never, ever leave you." He tasted the salt of his tears on his lips. "Just… don't go away..."

He cupped her jaw in his hand, cleaning the tears from her cheek with his thumb. She smiled through her tears. She did love sleeping on his chest, falling asleep with his heartbeat. "I love you." She whispered, her voice was cracked because of her tears.

"I adore you." He answered. "Come here." He slid down on the bed and opened his arms. She lay down with her head on his chest. She heard his heartbeat, and whispered: "I can hear your heartbeat."

"No matter where I am I can hear it beating." He added. They both chuckled at the 'Spring Awakening'-quote, they loved the show and both auditioned. Jesse for Melchior and Rachel for Wendla. They didn't know if they got it yet.

After a few minutes, Rachel said: "Jess, I think I need a shower, I smell like a waste container."

"Sure. Need a hand with your bandages?"

"Yes please." She smiled. A smile that was so genuine and loving, it made his heart melt. This time, there was no hurt in it, because with him by her side, she felt like she could take anything . She felt the same way she felt in high school, when she was dating him. She didn't care what the glee club said about her anymore, because he could understand her and loved her for who she was.

Finn didn't. Finn loved the parts that seemed acceptable, not the true Rachel Berry parts. Puck did. But not in a love-relationship kind of way. In a brotherly kind of way. He protected her when they said nasty things and dried her tears when she heard them and ran off to the washrooms.  
>Jesse did, and also in a love-relationship kind of way.<p>

She got up, but was caught off guard by a shot of pain running through her chest. "Are you okay?" Jesse asked hurriedly.

"Yeah, it's okay." She said, and got back up. They walked to the bathroom and she took off her bra and panties. He kneeled down in front of her and got the bandage off her ankle.

When they were done, they examined her body. The bruises were really visible now, but the cuts were already almost healed. She looked up at him. He was still glaring at the cuts, abrasions, and bruises. She saw a tear tickling down his face.

"Why are you crying?" She asked worried.

"I'm so sorry…" He whispered.

"Why?"

"It's all my fault. I- If I ran after you last night, this wouldn't be happened… I just…"

"Jesse, none of this is your fault." She wrapped her arms around his waist and pulled him closer.

"Yes it is." He said, the sound a bit muffled by her hair.

"No it isn't." She let go and cleaned his tears away with her small hands. "Now go get the paper to read the reviews of yesterday." They both smiled. He stepped away and turned the shower on. Then he grabbed a towel and lay it on the chair next to the shower and went out the door.

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><p>When he arrived home again, he found Rachel sitting in the couch again. He couldn't help but have a bit of a déjà-vu feeling. She just wore a black tee shirt of his, with a mosaic of white boom boxes on. It was his favorite.<p>

A few moments later he was reading her the review of Wicked in the Broadway paper.

"_Wicked has an amazing amount of fans, and has grown to one of the biggest  
>Broadway shows in the history. It was their last show yesterday,<br>and may I say it was spectacular? It probably is one of the best show I have ever seen.  
>That probably has something to do with the chemistry between Rachel Berry, aka 'The Wicked Witch Of The West' and Jesse St. James, aka 'Fiyero',<br>and their perfectly harmonizing voices. __Never have I ever heard such a strong duet as '__As Long As You're Mine'. …"_

"Wow, seems like they really like us." Rachel laughed when he was done, trying to ignore the pain in her chest. "Seems like they do." He said, before pulling her into a deep kiss.

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><p><strong>This was it! Hope you liked it?<strong>

**Please, review; it really makes my day!**

**Oh, and I do not own Jesse St. James -wish I did- or Rachel Berry, Noah Puckerman, Broadway paper (does that exist?), Wicked and his chapters, or Spring Awakening. **  
><strong>Love, Hach.<strong>


	6. Chapter 6

**Here's the next chapter! I sorry it took so long...**

**First of all, I want to give Elphaba wannabe the credit for the nurses dialogue, the idea of giving Rachel a hart condition, the idea of the rare blood type, and I want to thank her for giving me all the medical information. So thank you so much (:**

**next, I do not own Glee, Josh Groban, Adele, or Hello. Hope you like!**

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><p>The next morning Rachel awoke with two strong arms wrapped around her waist. She smiled as she felt Jesse's breathing in her hair: it was soft and regular, sending shivers down her spine. Rachel got out of his grip and padded to the bathroom calmly. It was small, but it had all the things you needed in a bathroom, so whatever. She looked in the mirror, examining the bruises and abrasions that covered her face. She groaned at the sight, hating that it was a constant reminder of <em>him<em>.

But what she hated more, was him himself. She didn't get it: how could he have been so nice and sweet and now so mean? So heartless? He wouldn't even hurt a fly back then, and now… She hopelessly tried to get rid of the memories of that night when he almost killed her. She was so thankful Jesse was there then, otherwise he could've even succeeded, she thought.

So she wasn't dead. _Then why are you so worried? _She asked herself, dragging a finger over the blue and purple bruise that covered the right side of her collarbone. She brushed her teeth, combed her hair and walked back into the bedroom, where Jesse was still half asleep.

She stepped in front of her closet and picked out a blue dress with red roses and a red ribbon around the waist. She held it in front of her in front of the long mirror in the left closet-door before laying it down on the end of the bed. She noticed two eyes watching her and looked up at Jesse, who was fully awake now, sitting against the wall with his back.

"You like?" She asked him, holding the dress up.

"I love." He answered, "But I do think you need to slow down a bit, till you're fully recovered…"

Rachel smiled and walked back to the closet, reaching for a black shoe box that contained her favorite red pumps on the upper shelve. "Oh please-" She said, before being cut off by a pang of enormous pain in her chest, and collapsing. He shot up immediately, and in less than 2 seconds he was sitting next to her with his knees on the ground. "Rachel? Rachel?"

She didn't move. "Rachel! Answer me!" Jesse called desperately before getting up as fast as he could and grabbing his phone on the nightstand.

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><p>Jesse sat on the white chair in the hospital lobby. His face was covered by his hands, as were his now red, puffy eyes. It was like his eyes ran out of tears: he couldn't cry anymore like they had to make new ones and he was in some kind of trance. Things like: <em>It's all my fault, I should've ran after her! <em>or _Please God, let her make it… _were flying around in his head, echoing like it was said by a little person inside there.

He ran a hand through his hair and paced around the lobby, trying to mentally connect with her. Which was impossible, sure, but people do these things in situations like this.

"_Rachel baby, you can do it, I know you can. You're the strongest woman I've ever met, you can do it… Please Rach, please don't die, you can't die! You still have to accept your next Tony on that big stage, you still have to play closing night, you still have to marry me some day… Please Rachel, c'mon babe… Oh Rachel… I just don't understand… _

_It seems like everything's a dream these past hours ,but I don't know if I'll ever wake up… Come on Rachel, please stay with me, I can't live without you, I just can't! _

_I love you Rachel, more than anything in the world, don't go away… Don't leave me again, please… Please…_

_Rachel, Rachel, you're the best thing that's ever happened to me… I still feel guilty when I see you dancing around on that stage, how could I ever hurt such a beautiful person? I don't want to lose you!_

_I swear to god, if I ever find out who did this I'm killing the guy. Okay, I don't know what you have yet, but I can't help but freak out… You're too important to stay calm over. Oh Rachel… I know you can do it, you can. We can do it together…" _

Jesse paced through the hallway, and suddenly stopped abruptly. He took a few steps back and glared into the room he just passed. It was like a living room, with a crazy amount of old couches and… a piano. Jesse didn't hesitate, he just stepped into the room, walking straightly towards the piano. It was an old one, but it could do. He slid his fingers over the keys and sat down on the little bench. Soon the first chords of 'Hello' filled the room –and probably more than just the room. Followed by those of 'Make You Feel My Love' by Adele and 'Awake' by Josh Groban. After those three songs his fingers started hurting and his throat got dry, but he felt like he connected to her somehow by doing this: so he continued.

He played the first note of 'Hello' again, but got cut off by a knock on the door. Jesse looked up and found a nurse with a blonde pony standing in the doorframe.

"Jesse St. James?"

"Yeah, that's me." He replied, standing up from the bench and making his way to the nurse through all the sofas.

"I have news about you girlfriend. Come with me."

Jesse nodded and followed the nurse back into the lobby. The signed him to sit down at the chair again, which he did.

"Uhm, I am sorry to say, but Ms. Berry here has a severe case of internal bleeding. we are doing all we can do, but it doesn't look very good." She said officially, holding the clipboard against her chest. "Mr. St. James?"

Jesse stared right in front of him. Just stared with his eyes wide open. He didn't even heard the nurse calling his name. He felt a very uncomfortable feeling creeping up inside him, some sort of panic, mixed with anger, hatred, pain, sadness, love, anxiety,...

It was like the world didn't move anymore: like it wasn't real. His breathing got heavier as he travelled back to the time when he was still a young boy.

_Flashback._

_Jesse sat on the ground in the Akron hospital. He didn't like to be there, in what for him was a house full of sick and 'soon-going-to-be-dead' people. He was bored to death, there wasn't even music: only toys. Stupid toys like barbies or dolls or teddybears. _

_Next to him sat his older sister, doing her math homework. He just wanted to ask her if she wanted to go to the cafeteria with him, -which he was actually quite sure she'd say no to, but he would've at least have done something useful- when his mom came back in the room. Her face was flushed and she held a paper handkerchief in her hand. _

_End flashback._

From then on, his memories faded. But hey, you don't remember a lot from when you were seven right? The only thing he could remember was his mom crying "…Internal bleeding…" and the funeral. His aunt was more of a mom to him then his own mom, and he had a rough time getting used to her not being there when he came home from school anymore. -He lived with her when she was still alive, since his parents were gone on business trips all the time. And he knew for sure it would be even harder getting used to Rachel not being at his side nearly every second of the day.

His breath shocked as the voice and the sound of his mom crying filled his head. "Internal bleeding.." His eyes tried to fill with tears again, but once again it was like there were none. "Sir?"

His head shot up, the voice bringing him back to reality. "Is there _anything _you can do?" He asked the woman, trying the best he could to keep his voice normal.

"Yes, there is. But she'll need a blood donor, and she has AB, which is very rare and makes finding a blood donor almost impossible."

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><p><strong>Review? <strong>

**Love, Hach.**


	7. Chapter 7

**I know, I know, it's short. AGAIN... sorry!  
>Oh, also, please don't mind my grammatical faults or something, I'm way too tired to check and i don't want to keep you guys waiting any longer!<strong>

**I do not own Glee (l)**

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><p>The nurse stepped into the lobby. She was still carrying the clipboard and her eyes were locked on the paper it was clipping. She walked over to Jesse, who was playing angry birds on his Iphone.<p>

He nervously shot the birds to their goal, but it just wouldn't work. He decided just now he should do something 'useful' while he waited for the nurse to get his blood type file.

"Mr. St. James?" she called to get his eyes of the screen and on her face. When he didn't react on his name, she gently laid a hand on his shoulder, squeezing it lightly.

"What! Oh, sorry miss…"

"Mr. St. James, I looked into your file, and it seems that you, just like your girlfriend, have AB as your blood type."

"Really?" He cried out, jumping up from his seat, heavily smiling. "What are we waiting for? Give her my blood! Like NOW!"

"Sir, I'm sorry, but we can only operate over one week…"

"Why..?"

"We need a week surgery preparation, you're lucky she has good health insurance."

"Oh…"

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><p>The following week went by in a haze for Jesse. He would spend all of his free time with her, he would skip most rehearsals and leave for the show as late as possible.<p>

Every night there was a show that week, he had to kiss the back-up Elphaba. He felt a pang in his chest every time. And every night, when he lay in bed, he felt like he cheated on her while she lay in the uncomfortable hospital bed, unable to stop him. It wasn't really cheating of course, it was a stage kiss, acted. But it felt like it was to Jesse.

If he wouldn't have to perform every evening, he wouldn't have showered. But he felt obliged, after all, he performed on Broadway. Plus after every performance he was bathing in sweat, and if he didn't wash that of for a week, he'd smell awful and he could even get fired.

When he was with her, he mostly sang to her as he caressed her hand or just watched her as she slept, or he would insert a dvd of her favorite musicals in the old television.

Jesse spend a lot of time thinking too, if he didn't sing or hum. He then sat on the windowsill, either watching the movements outside three floors lower or watching her making none. He'd think about what happened, he'd try to figure out why somebody would do something like that, and most importantly, he'd think about their future.

'_Be optimistic, even in the worst of times_', his dad once told him, and it was something he'd never forget. So in these times, which were obviously the worst of the worst, he still thought about the future. A good future, a wonderful future for them, together.

They'd live in a big villa, just outside the city with a huge garden where their kids would play till it became almost dark and the nanny came because mom and dad had to play in the theater.

Their sons would be just like Jesse: huge players, who could get all the girls and had a bright future ahead of them. Girls would beg them to go out with them, but eventually they'd find the girl of their dreams and stay with her forever, just like Jesse was planning on doing with Rachel. They would have two sons and one daughter, the daughter being the youngest as her brothers could watch out for her and kick every guy that hurt her or broke her heart's ass.

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><p>Finally, the week had passed and Jesse entered the room where the nurse would take his blood. The cranky nurse gestured him to sit down in the chair in the middle of the room, so he did so.<p>

"Okay Mr… St. James, I'm going to insert a needle in your upper arm, in your femoral artery. Don't worry, it won't hurt much." She said robotically, as if she studied the words. And with that she took the needle with the long tube and gently pressed it into his flesh, into the vein after cleaning and disinfecting she covering skin with a small gauze.

When she was finally done, she gave him a juice and some crackers. Jesse had no idea why, but he took it without questions: it wasn't his fault he was starving! The nurse told him they gave these to people after they had blood taken, because some go in shock.

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><p>Jesse already sat in the lobby for 2 hours. He nervously paced back and and forward the space as he decided to sit down, since the pacing wasn't going to help anybody anyways. So here he was, playing with his fingers.<p>

His mind lured back to the six year old boy sitting on the ground in the Akron hospital. It was the first time he lost someone for forever, and it still was the only time. Thinking that that might change now made his stomach turn upside down. Especially since Rachel was the one he'd lose. He would never ever see or get her back if she didn't make it now.

It was then Jesse realized she might not live the operation, and that there in fact was a possibility she died. Then their whole future would be ruined, no two boys looking out for their younger sister, no beautiful house outside the city…

Then Jesse heard a voice calling his name, causing his head to shoot up. "Mr. St. James?"

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><p><strong>You liked? You disliked? Please review! <strong>

**Love, hach.**


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